How the Universe Encouraged Me on My Artistic Career Path

 

my digital artwork of Kim Jisoo of Blackpink

A few days ago, the universe gave me a sign to keep walking on my artistic career path.

 

I have been in a career limbo for two years now. After I graduated as a literature major in college, my parents immediately arranged for me a low-paying government job just so I can start earning money. I was not even consulted about it; they just talked to someone high up the hierarchy and then one day I just woke up and I had to go to work. Needless to say, I disliked the job and I was not good at it no matter how fast of a learner I am. I also was not prepared for the workplace bullying and politics that happened. I had the heart of a poet instead of a warrior. And so, I left it after nearly a year.

 

Just a few days later I started training for a bank job that I got accepted to. My former coworkers say I got the job because the bank manager liked the way I looked. He thinks that the bank would get more clients when they see a pretty lady. At first, I was so excited because I had full confidence in my brain – that it can pick things up quickly and that I can master the job in no time. Back then I had no idea that I was in a “out of the frying pan, and into the fire” situation. That banking job was hell. I was solely favored by the manager and I was good at my work which made me a target of workplace envy and bullying. The customers were bullies too and the management does not defend their staff from unfair treatment of the customers. I wanted to get out of it so fast but before I started working there I signed a contract that I should not resign for less than two years – or else I would pay back all the money that the company has paid for my trainings (airplane tickets, hotel accommodation, etc.). And so, I waited for more than two years to resign and endured all the evil there. I got out of that job traumatized, broken, and afraid of other workplaces too.

 

During the first year of my unemployed journey, I could not take even a single step. I was so lost and confused about what I really want to do with my life. I was around people who believe that I can only live comfortably if I secure myself an office job. However, I have found that to be false, and that caused tension within my home. I tried resting, traveling, and meditating in order to find the clarity that I seek. The intuitive answer I got, which I did not trust back then, was to be in the field of beauty. Being a small-town girl, I did not know what to do and how to start.

 

That period of confusion ended when a fashion school in Manila offered online classes. I started taking the basic classes and fell in love with it. Right then and there I had the confirmation from my heart that that was where I belong. Learning new things is hard; but the classes were all a breeze because my heart is rejoicing. I have finally found my own special place in the world – a world of beauty, art, and fashion.

 

Right now, I am in my second year of being unemployed. My parents are increasingly getting worried about me. The pressure is on, and sometimes they suggest that I just take random available jobs. That did not sit well with me, because for me that is basically suicide. For the past year, I have been studying fashion online, practicing sewing, learning digital and traditional art, and mastering the art of cooking. Imagine telling a law student to be a lawyer right away even though he or she is not yet ready. That is how I felt. When mastering skills, we need time to focus on them. The pressure put on me was really unnecessary because my fiancé is supporting me while I am still getting ready to be a professional fashion designer and artist. Other than that, I make art commissions and sell stuff that I sew as a side hustle. I get paid while I learn.

 

Even though I am already on the path of an artistic career, I couldn’t help but get confused again. I was made to feel that what I am doing is useless. So last week I started listing my strengths and weaknesses. Some weaknesses of mine can be improved, a few are non-negotiable; some strengths only needed to be maintained, while some strengths needed to be refined and mastered. While I was scanning my list, I was reminded that my strengths lie on my creativity, artistic abilities, and my eye for beauty. But perhaps the universe decided that that was not enough encouragement for me. So it sent me another sign.

 

Two days ago, I was playing an online mobile game wherein the players have their own café and we cook a variety of dishes. It was appealing to me since I also consider myself a little chef. While I don’t play online games to socialize with other players but to rest my brain after learning and working on projects, I accidentally became close with another player from Myanmar. We are helping each other grow through the game. It all began when he asked me if having an artistic career path is hard. Through the conversation, we got to know how similar we were – we are both artists that draw portraits, love creative cooking, and we both enrolled in fashion design schools! The only difference is that my friend stopped studying fashion a month ago because his family is really against it. That made me realize how lucky I am to at least be supported by my fiancé.

 

That night, I pondered before going to sleep. It is interesting that we have known each other in such times. He told me that even though the world is against it, we can be supportive of each other’s creative careers. We have chosen an unusual career path that is hard to tread on alone. That was how I knew that Spirit is working for our own good. The universe sends signs and signals everywhere, and we must only try to be aware. But this time, it was not only a sign that was sent to me, but a real person of my age in another country that goes through the same rough patch as me. We can only get stronger at this point. I can feel that more help and support will come down the road, spiritually and physically.